*clears throat* okay this next song is called “im not my best friend’s best friend” and it goes a little something like this *throws the microphone* *muffled screams* *crying for 7 years*
So, part of my day job is calling clients to keep their files updated in our database. And of course, I hear some really interesting voicemail greetings. But today was by far the best one.
So I hear the greeting start up.
"You know who you reached, leave that name and number, and I’ll hit you back."
(By the way, her voice made me instantly imagine Tricia from Orange Is The New Black. You know, the blonde chick with the cornrows?)
So it fades into music that has slowly become more audible in the background. And what do you know, she’s jammin’ on some AWOLNATION. And this is my job, right? So I can’t hang up. So I have to sit on the phone and listen to a full minute of this chick recording fucking AWOLNATION at full volume as her greeting in order to leave her a message.
I started laughing at the tail end of my voicemail thinking about the sheer absurdity that is a grown woman making such terrible life decisions. I mean, I guess make them work for it, but can you imagine her friends?! They probably get so pissed off every time she doesn’t answer the phone.